Self-Esteem and Self-Care
Trapped with an inner-critic who won’t shut up?
So how do you feel when you are by yourself?
Content and happy… or like the world’s biggest loser?
Ever give it any thought… or can’t stop thinking about it?
How we relate to ourselves is everything.
You can’t beat up on yourself all day long and be happy.
If you paid someone to live with you, follow you around all day long, and say out loud the things you have been saying to yourself in your head…
You would probably be shocked at how mean, negative and maybe downright abusive you are to yourself.
These patterns can be changed!
Why do we treat ourselves this way?
Most of us follow the “no pain no gain” approach to mental health. We say the meanest things to ourselves in the meanest ways in an effort to motivate ourselves or to avoid being embarrassed.
The internal critic can really make your life a living hell!
When I ask clients, “Would you say that in that way to a friend who was going through a rough time?” Almost everyone says, “No way! I would never treat someone like that – not even someone I don’t like.”
I always respond, “Then why is it okay to treat yourself that way?”
Adults need encouragement, too.
We cheer on little babies when they are learning to walk – even though they fall over and fail hundreds of times a day. We know that tons of love and encouragement are the best ways to help small children persevere, grow, and finally learn to do things.
Adults are no different. The answer is always love and support.
Concern and constructive feedback fall under this heading, but it is always done from a place of love.
I admit that I have a bias toward all things self-care.
That means bubble baths, meditation, yoga, journaling, buying yourself flowers, lighting a candle, planning pleasurable activities, getting massages, sitting in nature…
You get the picture. Oh, and all of this stuff has been proven effective!
If you take care of yourself and balance out your life, YOU WILL FEEL BETTER!
I may drive you crazy by asking about your self-care, but you can’t say you weren’t warned.
Get the skills and start to practice them!
Everyone has a recipe of things they do and don’t do that makes their mood more stable. It is just that simple.
It is not a cure-all, but self-care is something you can do on a daily basis to support your self-esteem and mental health.
If you need help learning these skills and practicing them in the real world, then let’s get to it. Let’s figure out what you can put in your mental health toolbox to promote your self-love and healing!
You deserve to feel better right away! Call me today: (323) 363-9237
You really have to love yourself to get anything done in the world.” – Lucille Ball